Episode 103: An Interview with Jiselle Alleyne-Clement
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A couple of weeks ago, I had a chance to do an interview with Jiselle Alleyne-Clement. We got a chance to learn about each other, and more importantly, we saw how God moved in the midst of that interview. In case you missed the last podcast episode, you can catch up here. Here is Jiselle’s bio:
Jiselle Alleyne-Clement
Part 1
Jiselle Alleyne-Clement is a professional of many hats. She is an Academic Librarian, Educator and Researcher. She received her MLIS in Library Science from Dalhousie University, Canada. She also holds an MA in Leadership Studies from the University of Guelph, Canada and is currently reading for her PhD in Gender Studies at the University of the West Indies with focus on Female Leadership Development in Caribbean Organizations.
Part 2
Jiselle is the lead Empowerment Speaker, Vision Coach and Mentor, through her consultancy, ‘Pearls of Great Price Empowerment Services’; a consultancy developed for women.
The empowerment programmes offered through her consultancy are geared to help women manage the transitions in their lives and will treat with topics such as, but not limited to:
Transition Management
Moving from Potential to Success
Tools for Reinventing yourself in the Marketplace
Establishing Healthy and Productive (She)Team Cultures
Continuous Learning
(She) Leadership Development
Jiselle believes that every woman must be given access to this type of development where they can in turn LEAD within her sphere of influence. This can be done through:
Providing women with access to female leaders and mentors
Creating leadership opportunities for the women within the society
Helping women transition seamlessly and envision and create social change
At Valley of Grace, we believe in thriving. In order to thrive, we have to begin grounding ourselves in our identity. The first step in making this happen, is dealing with the effects of our childhood wounds. Click here to get started in Online Therapy today.****This is an amazon affiliate link where a commission is paid to offsite the cost of providing this information to you.
Are you saying to yourself, “I’m sick and tired of being stuck in one unhealthy relationship after the next. Life should be better than this. This does not look like the abundant life that Christ promised us!” Then this course is for you. It walks you through the process step by step to getting out of the revolving door of stuckness, and into the door of abundant living. But when are you going to open the door? Are you waiting for your friend or someone else to open it for you? That’s what the Course Broken Pieces is all about. It walks you through with personalized videos, getting you to the heart of the matter. ****This is an amazon affiliate link where a commission is paid to offsite the cost of providing this information to you.
Everybody has their own way of defining resilience. This poem explores my definition of resilience. It comes from years of being knocked down in the wrestling ring, so to speak, and having to get back up again and again.
At Valley of Grace, we believe in thriving. In order to thrive, we have to begin grounding ourselves in our identity. The first step in making this happen, is dealing with the effects of our childhood wounds. Click here for Online Therapy today.
This is an amazon affiliate link, where a commission is paid to offset the cost of providing this information to you.
I’m tired of being stuck in this position! You’re tired. And confused. You keep sitting there comfortably, uncomfortable waiting for your situation to change. You don’t have to sit in a state of confusion any longer. Broken Pieces does the work for you. This course walks you through with personalized videos, getting you to the heart of the matter.This is an amazon affiliate link that assists in paying for our blog expenses.
It’s very tempting to hold in and suppress your emotions. It’s especially tempting when your race/ethnic group has been suppressing their emotions because of generational trauma. What actually happens when we suppress our emotions? What happens when we let it out? I mean let it all out? What would happen if we invite God and our own unique stress response cycle into the mix? Watch today’s episode to find out. Click here for last week’s episode on being stuck in our mess.
Speaker 1 00:01:12 This is the Healing Our Brokenness podcast, where we dissect problems and solutions that exist among broken people, living in a broken world. And where we also go from broken relationships to resilience and flourishing. This is podcast episode 102, and this one is entitled, “Let it all out”. Quite a title, right? In this particular episode, we’re dealing with our emotions.
And what happens is once we start being still long enough, we will be able to listen to our bodies and be in tune with our souls and our spirits and realize that something is off. We will be able to say, Oh, grief is built up. This needs to come out. This needs to be released. After learning how to navigate moments of stillness, I now know when grief is trapped in my eye sockets, stomach, chest, back, or throughout my body. It sounds weird, but it’s true. Our bodies communicate this to us in our stillness.
Speaker 1 00:02:30 And then there are times where the grief is just deep inside my soul. And I know when it comes out that it’s going to be really intense and really heavy and loud. I can hear the loudness and intensity of the grief deep inside my soul. During those times I have to give myself grace because sometimes if I focus on how it should be, rather than how it is, It can lead to me being disappointed. And then disillusioned. And then discouragement follows.
Part 2
Speaker 1 00:03:31 The best thing we can do when grief gets backed up is to get it out. You have heard the old phrase, “Better out than in.” This is also true when it comes to grief. When we hold it in and suppress it, we are allowing it to transfer over to trauma. In Genesis 45, we’re at the scene where Joseph is talking to his brothers, and then you got other officials that are underneath him in rank in the room, his servants, so to speak, and his emotions have built up and he’s realized that. And so it was just like, okay, so what do we do with these emotions? We have to let it out.
I had a pretty emotional day about a month and a half ago,
Speaker 1 00:04:32 Things had not been going well leading up to that particular day. It had been a crazy week. A two hour adventure turned into a five hour adventure. I didn’t get home until almost 10 o’clock. I was cold and hungry, and exhausted. While I was in the process of getting all those things done, I could hear the inner voice crying out in my soul.
Speaker 1 00:05:32 Okay. I finally finished up at least 80% of what I had to get done and I got in the car and I said, I’m just going to have to scream and let it out. And it probably was maybe four rounds of that. And maybe another couple when I got home, but I felt so much better. And when it comes to those types of emotions, we have got to be able to get this stuff out.
Part 3
Sometimes getting it out doesn’t look pretty/ideal/or the way we think they should look. Either we get it out and we are able to control how it comes out or it is going to control us and who knows what’s going to happen, but it’s got to come out. And won’t be pretty. Exploding on others is not ideal nor healthy, and could have been avoided. We ended up getting sick like that. Usually when it comes on that heavy like that, you have a little bit of a space as a warning, as far as trying to go somewhere, to be able to deal with it in private, if need be.
Speaker 1 00:06:28 And I just thank God that I was able to get it out. I listened to a particular podcast episode recently where the podcast host, who’s a therapist talked about how sometimes she has to go outside to be able to scream or yell, or whatever kind of way she needs to, to be able to get those emotions out of her.
Part 4
And with blacks, we have to be careful anyway, because it’s part of our DNA from trauma, we are able to suppress the emotions, more naturally than usual because of that trauma. The other side of that is that our bodies are keeping tract of everything that we are going through. It is screaming out from arthritis and all kinds of chronic autoimmune diseaseas.
Speaker 1 00:07:27 We let it out and give ourselves compassion and grace and speak kind words to ourselves. Instead of going into self-blame, self-judgment and self-criticism mode. And we let it out. And what I want to do right now is talk about Joseph and what happened with him when he was in the room. As I mentioned before, he was surrounded by his servants and his brothers. He wanted to be able to tell his brothers who he was.
Speaker 1 00:08:30 Okay. And it got built up in his system. And I’m going to read what the scripture says. It says Joseph could not control himself in front of his servants any longer. “When Joseph could no longer control himself before all his attendants, and he cried out, “Have everyone leave my presence!” So there was no one with Joseph when he made himself known to his brothers. 2 And he wept so loudly that the Egyptians heard him, and Pharaoh’s household heard about it.
Part 5
3 Joseph said to his brothers, “I am Joseph! Is my father still living?” But his brothers were not able to answer him, because they were terrified at his presence.”
Speaker 1 00:09:31 Don’t be worried, angry with yourselves because you sold me here. God sent me here ahead of you to say people’s lives. No food has grown the land for two years and there would be five more years without planning or harvest. So God sent me here ahead of you to make sure you have some descendants left on earth and to keep you alive in an amazing way.
So it was not you who sent me here, but God notice that he told them that twice to reassure them. God has made me the official, the highest officer of the King of Egypt. I am in charge of his house. And I am the master of all of the land of Egypt. So leave quickly and go to my father, tell him your son, Joseph, see us, God has made a master over all. Each have come down to me quickly.
Part 6
Speaker 1 00:10:33 Joseph reminded me of myself, where he realized he couldn’t control himself any longer. He asked them to leave except for his brothers because he felt safe enough to be able to express himself and reveal himself in front of them. And sometimes we can let it out with others, with us. And sometimes we just have to do it by ourselves. The window of time is important, and discernment is important.
Speaker 1 00:11:24 Regulating our emotions is part of being resilient as well as being able to flourish in our relationships. Because if we are walking around in that much misery, we cannot have decent relationships with people. Our focus and our pain are only on ourselves and how miserable we are. We want to let it out, and Get back up again, within reasonable time so we can keep moving. So, I hope it was something that was said here today that will resonate with your hearts as you go from broken relationships to resilience and flourishing. I want to give a shout out to Timothy Horton for bringing the intro and outro music to us every week.
Part 7
Speaker 1 00:13:03 And that song is entitled Valley of Grace. And it can be found wherever music is sold. Healing Our Brokenness podcast is on iTunes, Spotify, YouTube, and on Amazon music, Stitcher, Google Podcasts, Apple Podcasts, etc. So, if this is blessing your life in any kind of shape, form or fashion, if you could please give a shout out to your friends, your neighbors, your family members, and ask them to follow us.
At Valley of Grace, we believe in thriving. In order to thrive, we have to begin grounding ourselves in our identity. The first step in making this happen, is dealing with the effects of our childhood wounds. Click here to get started in Online Therapy today.****This is an amazon affiliate link where a commission is paid to offsite the cost of providing this information to you.
Are you saying to yourself, “I’m sick and tired of being in this state of languishing!” , but you are confused about how to get out? You need someone to walk you through the process, step by step. That’s what the course Broken Pieces is all about. This course walks you through with personalized videos, getting you to the heart of the matter. ****This is an amazon affiliate link where a commission is paid to offsite the cost of providing this information to you.
Have you ever tried to squeeze into a space that appeared too small, or not even appeared to be too small; it was simply too small, but you figured you would squeeze into it anyway. This squeeze or force, if you want to call it, left you crying out, Help, I’m Stuck! And you stayed in that position until someone came to help you, or maybe you figured out how to untangle yourself. Being stuck doesn’t help with us being resilient because resiliency involves being able to adapt to change. We all get stuck every once in a while; but when this condition becomes our MO, then what? Tune into this episode to find out. Just in case you missed last week’s episode, click here.
Speaker 1 00:01:05 This is the healing our brokenness podcast, where we dissect problems and solutions that exist among broken people, living in a broken world. And we also believe that we’re going from broken relationships to resilience and flourishing, and the title of this episode, episode 101, is “I’m stuck”. Now, when you think of somebody saying I’m stuck, it actually makes me think of my daughter when she was two years old and she would get into the kitchen chair at the table.
And she liked to pretend like she was stuck so I could come over and help her. And, you know, kids do all kinds of things for attention, but that was one of her things. And my son would say, ‘Oh, mom, someone needs to help her. She’s stuck.” And in turn, I would say, “No, she’s not stuck at all. She’s gonna figure it out.”
Speaker 1 00:02:11 She would keep this up until I ended up going over there and putting her in the chair or getting on her before she would finally go on and sit down in the chair. And it wasn’t too long before that “I’m stuck” stopped. But anyways, the kind of stuck I’m talking about today is when it comes to grief. And one thing about grief is that we all have our own timetable.
It is not something that can be rushed. I would say some of us want to rush it. We wish we can just zoom past/plow through. That’s not how grief works. Grief is a process, and that process has got to be done. Some people when they grieve, they go through the entire five steps: the anger, the denial, the bargaining, acceptance,etc.
Part 2
Speaker 1 00:03:11 And then some of us may skip over one, do it all kind of ways out of order. I know with me, when I was grieving my divorce, my grief was all over the place. There was anger initially, but then my brain because of the trauma could not process the anger. Instead of processing anger, flashbacks and violent images occurred. And so the anger started to come in towards the end of my healing process from the divorce. Unfortunately, now in the scriptures, we have Samuel caught up in grieving over Saul.
Speaker 1 00:04:11 Saul was King and God had decided he was done. A done deal due to disobedience, extreme insecurity, and rebellion. Basically, God said,” You’re not King anymore. I’ve dethroned you. Samuel’s job was to go and appoint a new King.
And it was going to be the one that God was going to anoint. Samuel had been grieving Saul’s dethroning for a while. When it comes to other people’s grief, we don’t want to be judgment. However, in Samuel’s case, he was stuck on grieving something that had been going on too long. The scripture lets us know this by what God said, “the Lord said to Samuel, how long will you griev for Saul?
Part 3
Speaker 1 00:05:09 When I have rejected him as King over Israel, fill your horn with oil and go, I will send you to Jesse, the Bethlehemite, I have chosen a King for myself among his sons.” Okay. So there are some times when we’re grieving so long that we have to be pulled out by something or someone, but we choose to stay in. Grief can make you comfortable.
And, they can get to the point of being stuck in it and trapped if we’re not careful, you know? And so basically God was telling Samuel we’re done with this. We’re done with a capital D get up, let’s get moving. We’re done. Let’s get back to growing and moving forward.
Speaker 1 00:06:09 With us, there are times when God’s like, “We’re done with that relationship, we’re done with that friendship. We’re done with that job. We’re done with that house, that car, that opportunity. Get up and move forward.
As I said before, this is not with everything. But a lot of things can end up like this if we’re not careful. God has been telling us we’re done, and we’re still trying to keep it going, drawing it out. And God has closed the door on it, but we’re still trying to stay in the hallway hoping it will open or climb in through the window. When we’re done, we have to make ourselves get up so as to be able to adapt to change and be resilient.
Part 4
Speaker 1 00:07:05 When God says we’re done , we need to be able to be able to say that we’re done in our minds and in our hearts and in our souls. If we go according to what we feel, nothing will get done. We have to push past the feelings. I don’t feel like washing dishes. I’m not washing dishes. And sometimes that’s just what we need in order to nourish ourselves. We need to not do what we normally do.
Speaker 1 00:07:53 But a lot of times we make it our MO. I don’t feel like doing that. I don’t feel like combing my hair today. I don’t feel like going down the street to the store, but I need more milk. I don’t feel like getting tissue from the store, whatever it is.
We don’t feel like doing it so we can get comfortable and not do it. And then, next thing you know, three months have passed, and we haven’t vacuumed, or whatever we are holding off on. Grief is the same way. We can get stuck in it. We can’t go according to what someone else is doing. We have to go according to what our system is telling us. And that way we’ll be able discern whether we’re ready to move on or not. And more importantly, whether God is telling us this through sermons, sitting in stillness, reading his word, using others, etc.
Part 5
Speaker 1 00:09:03 And then we want to be careful judging people who are in grief and need to stay in it longer. Grief shows up differently for everybody. Some people’s grief shows up as rage. Some people’s grief shows up as looting or self-harm. Some people’s grief shows up as promiscuity, alcoholism, drug addictions, indigestion problems, crying, sadness, rage, vomiting, you name it. Some people have blood vessels to burst in their eyes as part of their grief. So when we get to the point of judging grief, we have to be very careful because we never know how we will react when it comes to our turn.
Speaker 1 00:10:08 Staying in grief longer than necessary causes us to engage in broken relationships, hinders resiliency, and our relationships with important people in our lives: friends, our parents, our children, small group members, etc. We still have live life while we walk through grief.
Part 6
Speaker 1 00:11:08 There are some times where we need to be alone. Other times, it may not be good to isolate. The devil want us to be by ourselves, which is not God’s plan. So I hope that something resonated with you from what I said, as we go from broken relationships to resilience and flourishing, I want to thank you for being faithful listeners every week. I want to give a shout out to Timothy Horton for bringing the intro and outro music to us every week.
Speaker 1 00:13:03 And that song is entitled Valley of Grace. And it can be found wherever music is sold. Healing Our Brokenness podcast is on iTunes, Spotify, YouTube, and on Amazon music, Stitcher, Google Podcasts, Apple Podcasts, etc. So, if this is blessing your life in any kind of shape, form or fashion, if you could please give a shout out to your friends, your neighbors, your family members, and ask them to follow us. Until Next Time. Valley of Grace.
When we think of the sun, we automatically think of its natural ability to provide us with Vitamin D. And boy does it make a difference when it is out as opposed to when it’s not, especially when we are talking about a day like today in the Midwest where it is super windy. Have you ever stopped to think about the sun and its effect on trauma? If not, and you think you are alone, think again. I hadn’t given it that much thought until about eight years ago to be exact.
The Sun And Its Effect on Trauma-Photo by Tomas Hustoles at Burst by Shopify
After having a series of events that led to compounded trauma, I started noticing that the sun has a tremendous effect on how I am feeling once the seasons are nearing a significant change. It is so much so, that it can be disorienting. The sun itself is the main trigger, but surprisingly, what goes along with it is the manner and angle at which it is shining, etc. that makes it a trigger.
Part 2-The Sun and Its Effect on Trauma
For example, two weeks of last month was a challenge for me when the sun came out. Thankfully, I had my toolbox available and ready. As I sat at the table taking notes for my class, I observed how beautifully the sun was shining through the kitchen window. I also noticed that my body was having a reaction to it. The birds were singing their tune, and it sounded so pretty, yet something seemed off.
I knew that being still long enough would give me the answer. While listening to the teacher, I reminded myself, “This is a trauma trigger. The source of the sun causing havoc will soon be revealed.” And in no time it did. My mind went back to something that happened literally twenty-four years ago, on my birthday, when I had to rush and leave work because I thought I was having a heart attack, only to find out a few months later. Along with this revelation came the feelings along with it, as I sat there at the table.
Part 3-The Sun and Its Effect on Trauma
I allowed myself to feel the loneliness that I felt back then, allowing myself to remember it, and the emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual toll that it took on my health; but then also reminding myself that it happened in the past. I could lean in, discover the origin, feel it, and then process, and move on with my day.
In the comments down below, would love to know if you have noticed how the sun and its presence triggers your trauma. If so, how were you able to get yourself back to a point of resiliency?
At Valley of Grace, we believe in thriving. In order to thrive, we have to begin grounding ourselves in our identity. The first step in making this happen, is dealing with the effects of our childhood wounds. Click here to get started in Online Therapy today.****This is an amazon affiliate link where a commission is paid to offsite the cost of providing this information to you.
Are you saying to yourself, “I’m sick and tired of being in this state of languishing!” , but you are confused about how to get out? You need someone to walk you through the process, step by step. That’s what the course Broken Pieces is all about. This course walks you through with personalized videos, getting you to the heart of the matter. ****This is an amazon affiliate link where a commission is paid to offsite the cost of providing this information to you.
Have you ever been tired? And not just tired, but more like exhausted? And on every level? Did you know that emotional exhaustion can lead to burnout?
Burnout isn’t something that comes out of the blue. It is a slow process that has been happening over time. Catching it and being proactive about dealing with the symptoms helps to build up resiliency, giving you a collection of tools that you can used in case the problem resurfaces. We are not God where we know what can tip us over the edge. However, we can get to know ourselves better so that we can know our limitations, and prevent the entire process itself from unraveling. For the podcast on the Gift of Limitations, you can check that out here. If you missed the last podcast interview with podcast host and ministry of music Christen Clark, you can catch up on that here.
Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. 12 After the earthquake came a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper. 13 When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave.
Then a voice said to him, “What are you doing here, Elijah?”
At Valley of Grace, we believe in thriving. In order to thrive, we have to begin grounding ourselves in our identity. The first step in making this happen, is dealing with the effects of our childhood wounds. Click here to get started in Online Therapy today.****This is an amazon affiliate link where a commission is paid to offsite the cost of providing this information to you.
Are you saying to yourself, “I’m sick and tired of being in this state of languishing!” , but you are confused about how to get out? You need someone to walk you through the process, step by step. That’s what the course Broken Pieces is all about. This course walks you through with personalized videos, getting you to the heart of the matter. ****This is an amazon affiliate link where a commission is paid to offsite the cost of providing this information to you.
Podcast Transcription
Part 1A
Speaker 0 00:00:11 Speaker 1 00:00:55 This is the Healing Our Brokenness podcast where we dissect problems and solutions that exist among broken people, living in a broken world. And we also believe here at healing our brokenness podcast, that we are going from broken relationships to resilience and flourishing.
Have you ever been tired? Not just tired, but more like exhausted and on every level, did you know that emotional exhaustion can actually lead to burnout and burnout Isn’t something that just comes up out of the blue? It’s a slow process. That’s been happening over time, catching it and being proactive about dealing with the symptoms helps to build up the resiliency.
And it gives us a collection of tools in our toolbox that we can use in case the problem resurfaces. Again, we’re not God, and we cannot know every single time what’s going to tip us over the edge. However, we can get to know ourselves better so that we can know our limitations and we can prevent the entire process from unraveling like a domino effect.
Part1B
Speaker 1 00:02:22 For further explanation on limitations, the podcast called the gift of limitations, would be a great resource. And that one goes into more detail on being able to understand our limitations and to respect them.
It was about four years ago, I guess I would say really five. When I think about it from the period of 2016 to 2018, I had maybe four episodes of being emotionally exhausted. And, these episodes occurred because of a combination of compounded trauma, my own trauma, my kids’ trauma, supporting them, the trials I was going through at the time, etc. A lot of it being financial.
And what happened was, there were several nights in a row where I had not slept well, and when I say not sleeping well, two to three hours of sleep, four nights in a row. And I knew by night number three, I had basically maxed out.
I looked like I was depressed. And when my daughter saw me, she said, are you okay mom? And I said, yeah, why not? You ask? She said, Oh, you just look like you lost your best friend. And so I went and looked in the mirror and I was like, Oh wow, I look a hot mess. Even when my son came in the door, he said, man, you look jacked up.
” Oh, thank you.” And I laughed it off, but I really was not in a good state at all. Yes, grief had gotten backed up. And so between the grief and the insomnia together, it was just a bad mix. It was straight from the pit of hell, literally. And so we all know that when we don’t get enough sleep, it ripples down to other things, it can lead us to be more emotional.
Part two
Speaker 1 00:04:30 And then on the other hand, when we’re more emotional and we have all of this stuff built up in our system, particularly grief that can also lead to sleepless nights because once we max out, our bodies are going, “we’re done”. We’re not going any further until I get enough of it out and then you can rest. And so that’s exactly what was happening too. I mean, just emotional exhaustion.
It did not lead to burnout, but yeah, could have had I not paid attention to my body and kept going due to all of those issues that I was dealing with at that time. And a lot, the people that I’ve heard speak on burnout, particularly ministers have mentioned about the spirit of cynicism coming in when burnout is approaching. A friend of theirs noticed and mentioned something to them about them getting depressed about some of the things that they would normally do.
Part Three
Speaker 1 00:05:30 They were not satisfied with anything. They found themselves feeling unfulfilled and just being cynical about everything being the beginning of it, along with the emotional exhaustion and the inability to rest. What I did when I felt the extreme emotional exhaustion coming on is this: I followed through the script, the one that Elijah did, basically, just to be honest with you.
Because of all of that in my soul and the despair and fear set in, I rested, poured into scripture, Bible studies, podcasts, sermon messages, music nonstop all day long for several days in a row to help me get back up. And even though I eat healthy, I made sure I ate extra healthy, and doubled and tripled up on teas those days. I was able to get back up within a few days and I was just like myself again. And with Elijah, he had been in battle.
Part Four
Speaker 1 00:06:37 He had gone through miracles. He performed all these miracles, killed all of these false prophets and had just run and run and run and run. So he ran himself out. So he finally sat down. It was like, ah, and he finally realized that, I guess I would say, realized the state that he was in. And then that’s when his soul expressed the despair, “Oh,, God I’m ready to die!”
And that’s how I knew I was not myself because inside I was like, “Oh, this is horrible! I can’t take it any more!” And it’s like, it’s one thing to be angry or bitter or resentful about something. Those are different emotions/feelings. So I knew something was off. And with Elijah, God told him to eat, eat, and then sleep and rest and then eat and then sleep again because he was going to need to be rested up for his journey.
Speaker 1 00:07:37 And sometimes we want to just do a quick fix and go on. And sometimes it is a quick fix, but sometimes it’s not. And, we have to give ourselves grace those types of situations. The way the Holy spirit works is really something else. Because after I dealt with this, might’ve been no time after emotional exhaustion occurrence number two, I saw someone else. And as soon as I looked at their face, I knew what that particular person was going through. And like I had the screaming voice inside, their outer voice said,” Oh, this is happening again!”
Part Five
They were filled with despair. And I responded, “you know what? Rest for about two weeks. And then we’ll talk. ” I had to set that boundary. I knew how I was in that condition. It would not do me any good to try to reason with someone who’s in that state, the state I had already been through and knowing what the end result was of being in that state. And I did empathize. I’m so sorry you’re feeling this way. I hope you feel better, but this is when we can talk.
And so, when we’re not sitting still long enough, outside of having emotional exhaustion, giving ourselves margin, we don’t have the capacity to tell something is off, to know our limits, to question what is going on inside our souls. We just keep pushing till we can’t push anymore. Then Burnout!
Speaker 0 00:09:14 Sometimes we need someone else to notice like I did with my friend. Just saying, “You know what? You don’t look so well. And so in that case,
Part Six
Speaker 1 00:09:28 Listen to what they say. That’s when we know we have to set up boundaries and we have to take preventative measures for the sake of our own wellbeing. Resiliency happens when we are resting on a regular basis as part of our rhythms. If we are not giving ourselves margin, saying yes to everything that everybody asks us to do, not saturating ourselves in God’s word we will max out. Computer networks only have a certain bandwidth. So do we. In different seasons, different trials, and different ages and stages.
Speaker 1 00:10:08 Our abilities and goals and responsibilities can change off and on. They can change from one day to the next. We just never know. what could be the tipping point, but we want to be able to bounce back with resiliency, and that way, each time emotional exhaustion hits, it will be less intense.
Speaker 1 00:10:20 Your brain and body will thank you and say, “I know what to do. Been there. Done that.” After healing, If we get stuck in, “Man. I can’t believe that happened. Oh my goodness. I can not believe that happened”, we could just sit in that forever. Kind of like when I would wake up late for work. And I’m just like 20 minutes in the bed because I am stuck in “I can’t believe that this happened. “
Finally, I snap myself out of it by saying, “Ok Tina, you overslept. Now what?” Then, I get up and get moving. Speaker 1 00:11:16 With our souls will be joyous and glad that we did that. And so, God gave Elijah his next steps when Elijah came out of his near burnout, it was like, “okay, what do I do now?” And God was like, “you appoint this person. You appoint that person. You appoint this person.” Basically Elijah was not going to be doing all those things on his own anymore.
Part Seven
And a lot of times we get to the point that we get to because we’re trying to do too much and try to do too much on our own. So we can either take three days of rest or two weeks of rest to bounce back and become resilient, or we can take the whole year off. And the end of the day, it is up to us how we want to take care of ourselves and how we want to continue to flourish in our relationships. I am so preaching to myself right now. I promise you.
Speaker 1 00:12:09 Whether it’s at home, church, work, in ministry, wherever it is that we’re doing, we want to be able to continue to flourish. We want to be able to continue being resilient with self-care, yielding, and resting in God is part of that resiliency, those are parts of the formula. And we cannot leave that out. So I hope something said resonated with you. And I just want to thank you so much for listening in to every episode. I’m at one hundred episodes.
This is number 100 episode and I praise and thank God. I’m kind of in shock. You know, I know that it’s been a road getting here, but still the fact that it’s the 100th episode. I praise and thank God! And I also want to give a shout out to Timothy Horton for bringing the intro and outro music to us every week.
Speaker 1 00:13:03 And that song is entitled Valley of Grace. And it can be found wherever music is sold. Healing Our Brokenness podcast is on iTunes, Spotify, YouTube, and on Amazon music, etc. So if this is blessing your life in any kind of shape, form or fashion, if you could please give a shout out to your friends, your neighbors, your family members, and ask them to follow us.
Episode 99: Broken Relationships, Resilience, and The Danger of Validation
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Would you consider yourself the kind of person that goes in and out of relationships? Are you the cause, or would you say it’s the other person? If it is the other person, why is it that you find yourself staying in the relationship? What need is the relationship providing? Perhaps it’s validation. And if it is, the need for validation can easily lead to burnout. Ask Moses. Find out about this and more when you listen to this week’s episode: Broken Relationships, Resilience, and The Danger of Validation.
At Valley of Grace, we believe in thriving. In order to thrive, we have to begin grounding ourselves in our identity. The first step in making this happen, is dealing with the effects of our childhood wounds. Click here to get started in Online Therapy today.****This is an amazon affiliate link where a commission is paid to offsite the cost of providing this information to you.
Podcast Transcription
Speaker 0 00:00:17 Music plays. Valley of Grace Speaker 1 00:01:17 Welcome to the Healing Our Brokenness podcast where we dissect problems and solutions that exists among broken people, living in a broken world. And we also believe here at Healing our brokenness, that we’re going from broken relationships to resilience and flourishing. Today’s episode is episode number 99. And the title of this episode is broken relationships, resilience, flourishing, and the dangers of validation.
Now, when it comes to relationships, it takes a while to get to know people. And then after that, we have the time period, of getting to know them. We can pretty much tell if that person is going to work out for us. And this is whether it’s a romantic relationship or it could be a friendship or all of the above. And so, sometimes we get to the point where we are staying in our relationships too long and, they could be for a variety of reasons.
Speaker 1 00:02:45 And one of the reasons that we can stay in relationships too long would be simply just being in denial. We see the writing on the wall, so to speak and we are still trying to make a go out of it. Either the person is not treating us, right, or we’re not able to meet their needs, and there are consistent patterns of inconsistency.
For whatever reason, it’s not working out, and we are refusing to accept reality for the way that it is. So a lot of times we will stay in broken relationships longer than we really need to be doing. Another reason why we may stay in relationships would be for the simple fact of it fulfilling a need that we have. So we know that the relationship is not good.
Speaker 1 00:03:53 We know that this person is not good for us. They had not bringing out the best in who we are as individuals, not helping to bring out holiness in us. They are not helping us to bring out the qualities in us that, would basically help to elevate us in our calling in our worship of God and our walk with God. But we are in every toxic/incompatible relationship because we have woundedness inside.
And what is happening is we are having a need being met through that particular individual. And that’s why we are staying in something that we should no longer be in, indication of woundedness that has not been taken care of. But we are blinded to seeing that because we are addicted to having that need met at all costs. Speaker 1 00:04:55 So either we are being a savior to someone enabling them in areas of their irresponsibility or it’s something within us that is satisfying us.
That’s keeping us in that relationship. And sometimes it takes someone on the outside to come in to say, Hey, I noticed, you know, you keep telling me about the same thing where I notice you keep doing the same thing in response, or to initiate. Is there something else going on here that you want to talk about ? And so today I want to talk about Moses, who got to the point where he was standing and being judge over the people from morning, all the way till night. And we all know that if we’re doing something from early in the morning, all the way to night, nighttime, eventually that’s going to lead to burn out is definitely not going to help us to be resilient individuals.
Speaker 1 00:06:04 Because if you’re trying to develop a resilience emotionally, mentally, and physically, we have to have boundaries in place according to when we know our energy levels are at their best. And so what he was doing by wearing himself out, standing there and advising the people, he was not allowing himself time alone with God , to get his overflow so that he was be able to overflow and pour out to the people, but his need was being validated. He needed to have that approval. And that’s why he was in it so long. And I’m quite sure he was tired himself, but that need, that inner turmoil that was inside of him, that woundedness of having been rejected as a baby, those seeds and a spirit of rejection was already sewn into him.
Speaker 1 00:07:12 He also didn’t feel in place where he was because he knew that he was not an Egyptian. And it happens sometimes like this with people who are trying to get their identities and ethnicities figured out where, if they’re the child of parents, of two different races or ethnic groups, and sometimes they don’t feel at home in one group. And sometimes they don’t feel at home in another group and them trying to reconcile all of this. So Moses was having some issues with that need for approval and validation from these people, just from people in general.
And so their need to seek help and want guidance and want to judge over them was actually feeding into this need for him. So that means he was getting approval all day long from morning to night. And that could not have been good for his inner ego. And when we are in situations like that, it is so good that we have an inner circle. We have a support group or both. We have friends that see what’s going on, or either hear from what we’re telling them. And they’re coming to us and saying, you know what?
Speaker 1 00:08:43 I don’t think that’s good. Do you mind if I talk to you? You know, if we go out for coffee and we talk and this and that, the other, you know, I’ve been listening to you, and I feel like there are some missing pieces. Tell me about the situation.
One of the things about Moses, as far as trying to develop resilience, is that his body needed to rest, poured into, with the word of God, developing emotion intelligence, and to have emotional intelligence, you have to be able to be developing emotion skills. Because when you are talking to people all day long from morning to night, and you’re not taking a break to rejuvenate yourself, their issues end up weighing down in your spirit and soul.
Speaker 1 00:09:41 And so what happens though, we’re wounded and broken and that area needed validation and approval. We don’t even have time to think about that. We just try to fulfill that or whatever needs, which has to be addressed, or the cycle keeps continuing. Thank the Lord for Moses’s situation that he listened to his father-in-law. And this is what it says in the scripture. I’m going to read it for you guys. When his father-in-law saw all that Moses was doing for the people, right?
What is this you are doing for the people? Why all these people stand around you from morning. So evening, Moses answered him because the people come to seek God’s will, whenever they have it, dispute is brought to me. And I decide between the parties and informed them of God’s decrees and laws. Moses’s father-in-law replied. Speaker 1 00:10:41 What you are doing is not good. You people who come to you will only wear yourselves out. The work is too hard. You can not handle it alone.
Listen now to me, and I’ll give you some advice and may God be with you. You must be the people’s representative before God and bring their disputes to him, teach them. .. select capable, men, from men who fear God, trustworthy, men, who hate dishonest gain and appoint them officials over thousands, hundreds, fifties, have them serve as judges for the people at all times, but have them bring every difficult case to you. The simple cases they can decide themselves that will make your load lighter, because they will share it with you. If you do this God so commands, you would able to stand the strength and all of these people will go home satisfied.
Speaker 1 00:11:53 Moses listened to his father-in-law and did everything. He chose capable men and made them leaders of the people, officials over thousands, hundreds, fifties, and tens. They served as judges for the people at all times the difficult cases they brought to Moses, but the simple ones, they decided themselves. So like I said before, praise the Lord that Moses listened to his father-in-law.
And that was the beginning of ability to be able to be resilient is that he was able to take advice. His father-in-law served as a guide for him. And when we are going through our trials and tribulations, and our stories, we need someone to serve as a guide for us. This is what, his father-in-law DID for him. And that gave him space to be still, have that margin of space and time with God, to be able to deal with his own wounded business of validation.
Speaker 1 00:13:03 Because what happens is if we do not deal with that woundedness, then what happens is we’re always depending on other people to validate us, we’re always dependent upon other people to help us to feel worthy.
We’ll always dependent upon other people to help us to feel that approval when the only one that could give it to us, and that will fill us up is God. And every time we feel like, you know, we have arrived at a certain level of healing, there might still be times where every blue moon, that brokenness area will come up, we can say, dear Jesus! God help me! You have already validated me with your son’s death on the cross, I am worthy. I am valued, redeemed, the righteousness of God in Christ. I do not need anyone else’s validation to approve I’m yours Lord.
Speaker 1 00:13:51 So it’s not saying we’re not gonna continue to struggle. It won’t control us as it was doing with Moses. But as I said, thank God. He listened in the cases where we don’t listen. And we continue in what we’re doing that after a while, people will get tired of us. We’re human beings.
We’re not God. And they’ll say, you know what? You keep telling me about the same thing over and over again. We’ve given you our advice. You won’t take our advice. You keep saying the same thing over and over again. And it wears them out is what ends up happening. It just literally wears them out. Self pity is toxic and it wears people out. Victim mode can be toxic and wear people out.
Speaker 1 00:14:46 And so what happens is either we will leave because they won’t keep validating our brokenness, or they will leave because they’re sick and tired of hearing us. And we ended up having to come to the end of our ropes in a situation of languishing. Literally, before we get a clue, like something is wrong here, people keep leaving. My emotional, mental health is going downstream.
And when it comes to validation, it will go downstream because we have to keep constantly seeking that approval. And that addiction for approval. One while, I cleaned all day long to make sure that the house looked a certain way. And it was like, no matter how clean it was, it still wasn’t enough. I had to have it as a museum and I had to seek approval and validation and my self worth from my ex-husband and not realizing I was turning that into an idol. I was turning cleaning into an idol.
And the bigger problem was me and my identity. And knowing that God is enough. That was the biggest problem I had. Knowing he was enough, and that I did not deserve certain treatment, and have to prove anything different. So I hope that something that was said here today would resonate with you. I want to thank Timothy Horton for bringing our intro and outro music to us every week. And I want to thank you guys as my listeners for coming in and tuning in to Healing Our Brokenness podcast.
Until next time! Speaker 0 00:16:21 . Music plays. Valley of Grace.
One of my goals this year is to dive into black poetry and literature at a whole ‘nother level. Doing so has helped me in healing, as well as being able to aide me in one of my current book projects: writing a 300 page poetry book.
As with any particular group of people, you can’t assume that what works for one, works for all. As a whole, there is a stigma behind black people doing therapy. This poem deals with that stigma, and hopefully will get some of us to open up at a deeper level. Due to blacks having to suppress their emotions way back from slavery times, it is both difficult, and deemed as unsafe for them to show their emotions in front of others.
The reality of the situation is that when blacks show emotions, particularly that of anger, we are labeled as the angry black man or woman, having a higher chance of the police being called. What is natural for others is a luxury when it comes to black people, and demonstrating emotions goes along with that.
I hope that this poem gives you some food for thought. I would love to start a discussion down below on your experience growing with emotions, and how it was handled. Be blessed!
Today’s episode, Black History Part 2, takes you back and forth through a history of racism, spirituality, and how they all stretch back to the cross. In case you missed Part 1, you can catch that one here.
At Valley of Grace, we believe in thriving. In order to thrive, we have to begin grounding ourselves in our identity. The first step in making this happen, is dealing with the effects of our childhood wounds. Click here to get started in Online Therapy today.****This is an amazon affiliate link where a commission is paid to offsite the cost of providing this information to you.
Podcast Transcription
Speaker 0 00:00:05 We dissect problems and solutions that exist among broken people, living in a broken world. We believe that talking through our stories is the path that leads to walking through our healing. On episode 94, we had black history part one. And I shared with you guys a reading from a republished book that I did, I had written it five years ago, as I explained in episode 94. But just to kind of give a quick recap, I self-published my memoir, The Journey in 2016.
And so, in a couple more weeks, it’s going to be the five-year anniversary. I revamped the whole entire book and did some of the reading on episode 94. So, if you miss that one, you might want to stop this episode and go back and listen to it.
Speaker 0 00:01:16 I am going to do several readings of poetry today. Some of the readings will come from either one of three books that I’ve written. The first one is called My Blackness. The next book is called Surrendered. The third book is called Simply Grace. And then for the other poems, I have not given a title to that particular book yet.
And I am hoping and praying that you find something in the poetry that is like a balm to your soul. Something that resonates with you, might be a come to Jesus moment. It might just be something that you’d need to have to get you through the rest of this week. So, without further ado, here are the poetry readings.
Speaker 0 00:03:33 The first poem that I am going to refer to you is entitled beauty supply store. I love going to the beauty supply store, looking at all the possibilities for my hair, looking at the limited amount of money in my pocket and trying to figure out how to stretch it like Madea does when she sends us to the meat market. I love looking at the scarfs and the grease and the hair oil and the straightening combs and curling irons.
And let’s not forget the blow dryers and the plastic caps for hot oil treatments and keeping the condition in longer so we can get the kinkiness out. I love looking at the jewelry, trying to find the right pair of earrings, ones that express me, my personality, my blackness, my uniqueness.
Speaker 0 00:04:32 The next poem that I am going to read to you is entitled hair products. Where’s the blue magic? right here. I got coconut blue, green. Which one you need? I’m not sure yet, but maybe I’ll try Ultra Sheen, right here. I got green or blue. Which one do you need? Not sure yet. Okay. Where’s the let’s jam? Right here. Don’t want too much flakiness on my head. Just what products will I choose for my hair? Not sure yet. Just not there. Too many to choose from. This is what happens when you enter the beauty supply store for the black person’s hair.
Speaker 0 00:05:32 The next poem that I would like to read to you is entitled prayers. Saying those prayers at night, as my mom tucks me in so tight, rubbing my back, singing those songs, saying those prayers, you know, the ones that start,” Now I lay me”, those prayers. Yes.
And those prayers, the ones that your mom taught you as a baby in her womb, when it became unknown, your life’s paths would have to resurrect itself from the soul, denied betrayal. Our ancestors and forefathers fought hard to bring them. Saying those prayers at night, as my mom tucks me in so tight. The last one that I’m going to read is actually a quick short story and is called Hairy sandwiches.
Speaker 0 00:06:48 When you are growing up black, you know, there are certain things that call for good times, relatives visiting in the North from down-South and vice versa. Having a community that centers on food, dancing and pressing hair as a kid. When my relatives from down-South visited us in Chicago, you could be sure there was going to be a good time had by all.
My mom and my aunts would tell jokes and talk about old times like it was yesterday. I never grew tired of hearing the same old stories. My cousin Fifi came to Chicago and stayed with my grandmother for three days. At the end of her visit, we decided that we would ride back to Memphis with her. Not only would we get a chance to visit with her while she was here, but she was going to press my hair at Madea’s Beauty Shop beforehand, before heading back to Memphis.
Speaker 0 00:07:45 And I had to admit Fifi pressed hair just as good as Madea. Before leaving Chicago, I got my hair done. It was nice and slick on my head and I was ready. Why I had her to go through all this trouble, knowing that my hair was going to draw back as soon as I hit the Memphis sun, I don’t know. Fefe decided she would make what the black folks called the best thing ever, fried bologna and cheese sandwiches. The secret in making these sandwiches was making sure that they were only slightly burnt. That way you knew they would be perfect.
She prepared the sandwiches, chips, cookies, and drinks, and we all piled inside of the car. After a few hours of traveling, the kids were dying of hunger. One of the adults mentioned something about grabbing a sandwich out of the bag. I grabbed one sandwich out of the foil and took a bite. The sandwich tasted so good, but something did not feel right on my tongue. The texture of whatever I was tasting was not that of bologna, bread, or condiments. I tried to ignore it, but my gut told me that something was wrong. I opened my mouth and then pulled it out a small ball of hair with a string coming out of it.
Speaker 0 00:09:24 Do I tell them? And also, do I keep it to myself? That was the question of the day. I decided I would not say anything at all. It was just one sandwich. I opened the bag again, partially opening the foil for each of the other sandwiches. They all had small balls of hair in them as well. Cookies, chips, and drinks sounded more appetizing. It was a long hungry ride to Memphis. To this day, I don’t remember if I ever told anyone in the car about the sandwiches, or if they found out on their own. The moral of this story is to never prepare food in the same location of Madea’s beauty shop. It could be a hairy experience for all.
Speaker 0 00:10:22 He speaks is the title of this poem: He speaks but where will it be? In a message in a song, or the birds in the tree? Will it be in the midst of the wind blowing at night? Will it be in the calmness of the cricket singing in flight? In the morning when the rabbit is talking to squirrels or the munks tunneling through grass and the Robins dancing a twirl? Will it be in the waves that are splashing on the beach or the smiles of the saints as they’re waving hi, to me?
Will it be in the sun that is setting in the sky or the swans overhead that are reaching by and by? When he speaks, Will I hear him, same voice as before, or will it be with great trumpet, all of that, And even more? The next poem is entitled recovery. It’s recovery it’s recovery. It requires lots of discovery. What I think. what I feel, what my body tells me is real. Though it’s hard it’s recovery. God is there. In this discovery.
Speaker 0 00:12:01 And the last form from this book that I’m going to read is entitled reunion. hey left me for dead, But sold me instead. Endured being in chains, As favor surely reigned. Became second in command, Till the wife wanted my hand. In charge of the prison.
NO Release.
Just indecision. Till the king had his dream. God revealed all the means. Gave God all the credit. My life story had an edit.
Then my brothers showed up in hunger. Couldn’t take it any longer.
Told all the servants To leave the room.
As I cried out
Deeply Woven in mounds of gloom. Hugged them deep and cried out long. Filled our souls and showed up strong. The reunion wasn’t expected. But God’s grace had it protected.
Speaker 0 00:13:06 Okay? The next series of poems I’m going to read is from a book that is entitled Simply Grace. I am the vine and so, is it time? The deep wet dirt of the earth pulls me in as my little coral bells are just dancing in the wind. Then the dear clematis vine He shouts loud with his trumpet from the East to the West. You don’t miss his triumphant. I am the vine. You are the branches just trust in me. I’ll take you through the trenches, parts of my vine is tied to the trellis. And then part of me sits on the earth where this mess is. Then the dear clematis vine, He shouts loud with his trumpet from the East to the West. You don’t miss his triumphant. I am the vine. You are the branches just trust in me.
Speaker 0 00:14:11 I’ll take you through the trenches. Then the husbandman gives orders to the dear clematis vine. It’s just not the hour yet. It’s just not the time. I wrap around, the heucheras, the heucheras the color of wine. And I pray in the garden till beads of sweat So intertwined. Then the husbandman calls out it is time for the trellis. I will send out relief through a comforter where this mess is. Then the dear clematis vine, he shouts loud with his trumpet, from the East to the West, you don’t miss his triumphant. I am the vine. You are the branches. Just trust in me. I’ll take you through the trenches.
Speaker 0 00:15:02 My next poem deals with identity. And sometimes even when we think we’ve got it down pat, the devil will come and run amuck on us and have us question everything all over again. And that’s when we have to speak words of life over our souls to get ourselves grounded. So the name of this poem is entitled. Who am I?
Who am I? I am a child of the King. Did you see his right hand? My name is printed with a ring. Who am I? Who am I? I am a princess and a daughter, drafted in Royal priesthood in his image and his order. Who am I? Who am I? I am promised that I’m his, he’s my maker and my husband. He’s my counselor and my friend.
Speaker 0 00:16:02 The next poem that I’m going to read is called cries of the heart. I cried. I cried from all of this trauma. Oh my dear Lord. Did I need any more drama? Oh my dear child, please come close. Just draw near. Let me whisper a little something in those precious little ears. I have plans for you. Plans to prosper, not to harm, meditate on my word, and you’ll never be alarmed, for this Trauma is a Thorn, a thorn in your flesh, but it’s also a gift that will put you to the test. The things that I show you are great things from above, not vanity or conceit, they are given to you with love. And the last poem I’m going to read from this book is entitled empathy. Yeah.
Speaker 0 00:17:05 It’s not the same as sympathy. I understand just what you’re feeling. Not sorry for. It’s not the willing. I sit with you. You sit with me. It’s empathy, now, Can’t you see? Oh yes. I feel just what you feel. It is not a matter of the will. I will not rush your pain at all. In life, We all must feel the fall. I laughed with you. You laugh with me. We cry and cry till tears run free. Empathy, empathy. It’s not the same as sympathy.
Okay? So the last group of poems that I’m going to read, are not in any book yet.
You’re black
You’re black
Your dignity
And integrity,
Self-respect
Not kept in tact.
Because
you see
Your skin
Erases
all those things
And all we see is lack.
I’m not complaining.
‘Motionally draining,
And with my service
I give back.
So, wash, and rinse,
And dry again.
And just absorb
Those facts.
My Hair is Nappy
My hair is nappy and kinky
Don’t you see the bees
In the back
I don’t look pretty
Look crazy and silly
Matter fact, these
‘tails look whack
Your hair is beauty
It’s my creation
Your hair, the glory
Part of me.
You queen from Africa
Queen from Sonship
Queen from My Identity.
Speaker 0 00:20:34 The next poem is entitled Get up here
Wash those dishes
We better hurry
‘fore Madea
Come down
And blast us
With those switches
Add the water
Then the soap
Then pour plenty
Of that bleach
Till the smell reaches
Our lungs,
Becomes more like a leech.
So that was get up here. There’s a lot of stigma in the black community around emotions. A lot of it has come from post-traumatic stress syndrome and post traumatic slave syndrome.
Suppression
Cry
Just cry
Just let it all out
You see crying is a luxury
From when slavery came about
Hold it in
Just suppress
Don’t you say a mumblin’
Word.
To your wife
Or your kids
As we gather them like herds.
Black folk don’t do therapy.
Black folk don’t do therapy.
We pray and we cry.
Yep, we cry in private.
But in public our tears run dry.
Black folk don’t do therapy.
We’re strong as a people.
We just slay in the Spirit.
Till our Prayers hit the steeple.
Black folk don’t do therapy.
We just hope and we pray.
That our unhealed
Brokenness
Will up and leave us some day.
Black folk don’t do therapy.
‘Cause we think it’s a sin
If we bring down from
bondage
Generations had to win.
Black folk must do therapy.
‘Cause then we can negate
Ev’ry game that’s been
Played
‘Gainst the enemy
Called hate.
Black folk must do therapy.
Till we break all devices
That’s been sown
Into seeds.
Then planted
With preciseness.
Black folk must do therapy.
So our kids
Will one day see
That our growth,
Faith, and healing
Was a bicycle
Made For me.
Speaker 0 00:24:01 I want to thank you for being faithful listeners each and every week. And I also want to ask you to follow us on iTunes, Spotify, Stitcher, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, or Youtube, if we are making a difference in your life. And then I want to give a shout out to Timothy Horton for bringing us our intro and outro music each week. Until Next Time.
This week’s episodes are focusing on Black History month and Black Literature. In this episode, I am doing a reading from “The Journey”. You are able to get a picture of what it was to live in the South in the 1960’s, along with the dynamics of being black. I hope that you enjoy this reading, and that something that is read will resonate with your soul as you listen to Black History Part 1.
At Valley of Grace, we believe in thriving. In order to thrive, we have to begin grounding ourselves in our identity. The first step in making this happen, is dealing with the effects of our childhood wounds. Click here to get started in Online Therapy today.****This is an amazon affiliate link where a commission is paid to offsite the cost of providing this information to you.
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