What happens after the bombing?-The Relationship Cycle
The question that one might ask themselves is: what happens after the bombing? As stated in our previous post, after the bombing comes the sea of shame. And although you would think your soul’s reaction would be enough to make you stop and think, oftentimes, it doesn’t.
There is a small percentage of the cases where the individual takes a time-out based upon their body, mind, and soul’s reaction to love-bombing. However, 9.9 times out of ten, the reason you were picked as a target in the first place was because of your issues with low self-esteem, low self-worth, poor body image, or a combo of all three.
As sad and unsettling as it may sound, you were picked because you were an easy target to be disarmed and molded into what the other broken person in the toxic relationship wanted you to be. What you haven’t figured out yet, is that you are expected to return the favor.
Not the favor and disarming and molding. The worship.
Love-bombing isn’t done just for the sake of it. It is done to pull you in like nothing else has so you can stay all in. Once you have demonstrated that you are all in, the love-bombing ends. That is too much energy to put into any one person for an extended period of time.
The other person in the toxic relationship wants to be worshipped just like you were. However, the rules for their worship is different. Unlike love-bombing that leaves you in a sea of shame, they want the worship without the shame. You can’t ever give constructive criticism, feedback, or point out any wrongdoing.
Giving your take on any of these areas means that you are tarnishing the perfect, distorted image of what the other broken person in your toxic/unhealthy relationship has created. And that is a no-no.
The worship that belongs only to God has now gone to man. God never intended that to be.
He made that clear when he gave Moses the ten commandments on the mountaintop.
Somehow, as women, with Satan’s help, we twist around the word of God, making ourselves believe that God has told us to do everything that our husbands want us to do. When “obeying” your husband lies in direct conflict of obeying and worshipping God, we definitely have a problem.
You don’t realize the severity of it because your brokenness of unworthiness, low self-worth, and not enoughness is leading you in making decisions. You, as the wounded person is depending on the other broken person in the relationship to provide the enoughness that you are lacking. But only God can do that.
Until next time,