It’s All About Trust

One☝️question🙋🏿‍♀️that a person may ask is, “ how do I define trust? “

Trust cannot be defined until we understand the concept of faith.

Why?

Both concepts involve the use of evidence.

Because we have seen evidence of God’s love, integrity, character, and history of being there for his people over and over again, we know that we can trust him to do what’s best for us, even when we don’t agree ☝️ with his version of our best.

We have faith 🙏🏿 in who God is.

The Bible says that faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen 🙈.

Trust is the by- product of having evidence through a person’s words and behaviors manifesting congruency that we can live a life of vulnerability and transparency with him/her.

Relationships with other people work the same way as they do with God.

Unlike 👎 God, people are imperfect. And so are we. They will disappoint us and we will disappoint them.

However, an assessment of the overall consistency of congruency in their words, character and behavior alignment, or the lack thereof, will help us to determine whether we can trust them or not.

For example, in healthy relationships, trust can be Reestablished after making bad choices because of Two people putting forth visible, Intentional, effort over a period of time ⏰.

However, when it comes to a toxic ☠️ relationship, trust can never be established until the person who is toxic goes under a major heart and life change.

So, in essence, toxic ☠️ relationships last because of a foundation of image or falseness, i. e. , false love, false trust, false hope, and false peace.

False love means Love ❤️ is equated to abuse.

False trust means Trust is equated to false evidence.

False hope means Hope is equated to false promises and heart ❤️ sickness 🤕.

False peace ✌🏿 means peace ✌🏿 is equated to the absence of conflict.

In order for any relationship to last, trust has to be at the very core of its foundation.

And in order for us to be able to stand against any situation that we face in life in general, Christ has to be our solid foundation.

As the old hymn 🎵 goes, “ On Christ the solid rock 🪨 I stand, all other ground is sinking sand.”

Stay tuned for our next post where we dive into more of an in-depth study on healing from narcissistic abuse.

Until next time,

Katina

That Beautiful Case

The Appearance

I want to tell you the story of that beautiful case that I saw.

When my son was about 8 years old, I bought all the various computer parts to build him a desktop.  I decided upon a royal blue clear case.  These cases were all the rave at the time.  You could see all the internal parts, and lights, etc.  I knew at his age he would think this was cool. 

The Struggle

The Manufacture of the case boasted “no white-gloves” needed.  Wow!  This was great.  So I thought.  The case should open with no problem.  He was going to be jamming with this cool case.  I pressed and pulled, huffed and puffed to get this case open.  Nothing.  Used tools ⚒️. Nothing. Finally, after getting my adrenaline going at full speed, I got the case to open.  I was worn out. 

The Truth

What they said, and the truth were two different things.  After sitting there for a few minutes, I felt weird.  Like really weird.  I looked down at my hand, and the case had cut a chunk of the inside of my thumb off.  Looking at it made me nauseous and light-headed.  I went down to the kitchen to take care of it.  The kids saw “that Look” on my face, as they call it, and they asked me what happened.  I told them, and they were shocked. 

The Healing

I decided to wrap the wound and bandage it up after using peroxide and Neosporin.  My thumb only has a little bit of discoloration now.  You can hardly tell how badly I got injured.  It’s just a scar.  Just so you know, I sent the case back and got another one instead.

Our Case

Some of you saw that one person’s profile.  It looked good on paper.  As a matter of fact, it sounded good.  But, once you opened the package, you were in for a big surprise.  You were cut so deep, that it left you wounded and bleeding out on everything and everyone. 

Our Reaction

But, for some reason, you are still holding on to that case, without digging deeper into the how’s, why’s , etc.  This person(case), will determine how you select all the others (friends, jobs, partners in ministry, etc.) until you deal with the wounds. 

You don’t have to keep bleeding out on everyone.  You can begin to dissect your cycle of unhealthy relationship patterns.  Even better, you can get bandaged up ⬆️in the process.  The question is:  When will you make that choice?

Are you saying to yourself, “I’m sick and tired of being stuck in one unhealthy relationship after the next. Life should be better than this. This does not look like the abundant life that Christ promised us!” Then this course is for you. It walks you through the process step by step to getting out of the revolving door of stuckness, and into the door of abundant living. But when are you going to open the door? Are you waiting for your friend or someone else to open it for you? That’s what the Course Broken Pieces is all about. It walks you through with personalized videos, getting you to the heart of the matter. ****This is an amazon affiliate link where a commission is paid to offsite the cost of providing this information to you.


#christianlifecoach#christiancoach#relationshipgoals#breakingthecycle#frombrokenrelationshipstoresilienceandflourishing#resilience#scars#wounds#katinahorton#christianauthor#ithoughtihadagoodcase#christianpodcaster#coach#christianspeaker

Jiselle Alleyne-Clement’s Interview

Whole Faith

What is whole faith?  Whole faith is the faith that you hold on to when you don’t have details of when, why, how, or where that the “what” you need to happen is going to happen.  When we having been praying for something so long, it is very tempting to throw in the towel.  It is easy to want to go according to what our feelings are telling us; that this thing that you want so badly is not going to happen.

Whole Faith says , “Lord, help my unbelief!” like the Father who cried out so very desperately for his son to be healed.  He had been demon possessed since childhood.  He didn’t know what else to do, nor what to say.  The disciples had proven his point of dealing with an impossible situation when they couldn’t cast it out.

faith, simple functional grace-filled living, simple functional grace-filled news, katina horton, blogger, whole faith, blogger, author, podcaster, writer, fear, trust

Whole Faith says, “Lord, here you go. You are in control.”  We release the situation to God.  We know that we have prayed enough, and we need to sit this thing at his precious feet.  And lastly, whole faith says as Jesus did as he hung on the cross, “Thy will be done.”

faith, simple functional grace-filled living, simple functional grace-filled news, katina horton, blogger, whole faith, blogger, author, podcaster, writer, fear, trust

What are some ways that you have had to exhibit whole faith in your life?

Season of Uncertainty

We are definitely living in uncertain times. During these times, it is important to keep ourselves anchored in God and his promises. It is also crucial to establish a creative outlet for ourselves, and our kids if they are still at home. Practicing self-care will help our souls and our ability to be resilient when everything around us is on shaky ground. This poem “Season of Uncertainty”, deals with our life as it is right now worldwide. I am currently reminded of God’s goodness as I type this because there are several birds singing their tunes right outside my kitchen window. To God be the glory! Blessings my friends!

Season of Uncertainty

The sun and birds.

The walks and talks.

Slowdown and family time.

There’s a growing whine.

When at home we dine.

In the midst of uncertainty.

It’s the unexpected.

When you feel neglected.

And a need to be hugged and seen.

When our faith is tested,

and the fear has rested,

in our hearts and in our souls.

It’s a time to trust.

Trust that God is good.

When the picture’s not whole, looks bleak.

When we search for others,

There’s no need to look further,

When his kingdom we will seek.

Last poem: Triggered

Episode 53: Do you trust me?

The Valley of Grace Podcast
The Valley of Grace Podcast
Episode 53: Do you trust me?
/

Trusting God: How many of us have thought in our minds, or asked someone the question: “Do you trust me?” Have you ever stopped to think of God asking us this question? Tune in to Episode 53 and find out what happens when we trust God while we wait.

Outline for “Do you trust me?”

  • Introduction
  • Our MO when we trust God
  • My Trust Test
trust, hands, control, outcome, faith, waiting, emotional health, mental health, physical health, sovereignty
Photo by Nicole De Khors at Burst by Shopify

Meditation Verses

Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
    and do not lean on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge him,
    and he will make straight your paths.

Proverbs 3;5-6

Last Podcast Episode: “Living in the Moment”

Vulnerability

Today’s poem, “Vulnerability” discusses the apprehension and reward that occurs when we embrace vulnerability. Enjoy the journey!

poetry, katina horton, podcaster, author, poem, emotional health, mental health, connecting, heart matters, vulnerability, trust, safe people, unsafe people
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Vulnerability

Connecting.

With People.

Go Deeper.

Be Strong.

Inviting.

Them in.

Is it Safe?

Am I Wrong?

poetry, katina horton, podcaster, author, poem, emotional health, mental health, connecting, heart matters, vulnerability, trust, safe people, unsafe people
Photo by Vlad Bagacian on Pexels.com

Vulnerability.

Is A Journey.

Once

They’ve Proven.

They Are Safe.

And

Our Path

of

Discovery

Helps Us

Finish

Our Own Race.

Other poems:

The Work of the Potter

Refusal to Heal

Take Off Those Clothes!

Introduction

Have you ever been embarrassed by a family member who may have commented as you were getting ready to leave out the door: “Are you wearing that? You should take off those clothes! Put something else on!” Of course, this is definitely a bold choice of words. However, have you ever stopped to consider God telling you that?

No, God doesn’t bash us. However, he does make suggestions that will benefit our good. He has miraculously saved us from the pit of hell, a life of sin and bondage, and all kinds of unimaginable things, but he sees that we still choose to wear the “grave clothes”. This is the point where we can imagine him screaming out: “Take off those clothes!”. It’s as if we still want to have a little bit of the old nature on us.

Dissection of the Clothes

What happens when we wear grave clothes? People can’t tell that we are Christians because we look, act, and talk like everyone else. We trade in the sweet fragrance of Christ, for the death smell of the grave that God has resurrected us from.

Why do we choose to do this? We won’t change our thinking so that our behavior can change as well. We are more comfortable with the stench of the grave clothes than walking in the newness of Christ.

So, how do we know that God’s desire is for us to shake loose from this putrid outfit? When Jesus resurrected Lazarus from the dead, Lazarus was bound in grave clothes. His first command was for them to take off those clothes:

Jesus Raises Lazarus From the Dead

38 Jesus, once more deeply moved, came to the tomb. It was a cave with a stone laid across the entrance. 39 “Take away the stone,” he said.

“But, Lord,” said Martha, the sister of the dead man, “by this time there is a bad odor, for he has been there four days.”

40 Then Jesus said, “Did I not tell you that if you believe, you will see the glory of God?”

41 So they took away the stone. Then Jesus looked up and said, “Father, I thank you that you have heard me. 42 I knew that you always hear me, but I said this for the benefit of the people standing here, that they may believe that you sent me.”

43 When he had said this, Jesus called in a loud voice, “Lazarus, come out!” 44 The dead man came out, his hands and feet wrapped with strips of linen, and a cloth around his face.

Jesus said to them, “Take off the grave clothes and let him go.”

grave clothes, trust, living, healing, brokenness
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And that is his command for me and you. He dares us to trust him with our new life!

Opening the Trust Door

We have all had trust issues at one time or another.  These issues usually stem from experiencing hurt from the people that are closest to us.  The poem “Opening the Trust Door” portrays a dialog that occurs between us and God.  God is the only one that can heal our issues with trust.  That is, if we invite him in.

trust, emotional health, ptsd, mental health, psychology, blog, blogging, belief, healing, brokenness, thriving, opening the door
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Should I trust again?

Do I let people in?

Will they bring me more pain?

Or, stand with me in the rain?

 

Do I stay in the cave?

Where it’s dark, but feels safe?

Or, do I walk out and thrive?

And thank God I’m alive.

 

If I open the gate,

Will there be much more hate?

 

“If you let me come in,

We’ll be more than just friends.”

Episode 18: Hearing God’s Voice in the Midst of Chaos

The Valley of Grace Podcast
The Valley of Grace Podcast
Episode 18: Hearing God's Voice in the Midst of Chaos
/

There are a lot of voices that we hear on a daily basis. However, discerning the voice of God becomes the most important one that we need to focus on. Do we know what to look for? Is it the same voice for everyone? These questions and more will be answered in this week’s episode: Hearing God’s Voice in the Midst of Chaos.

emotional health, mental health, spiritual health, podcaster, podcast, podcasting, author, blogger, writer, blog, katina horton, listen, obey, trust, follow
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com
  • Podcast Outline
  • How to Know It’s God
  • How God Speaks to Me
  • Truths on Hearing God’s Voice
  • Samuel and the Voice of God

Part #1 Hearing God’s Voice

Podcast Transcript:

Good afternoon!  Welcome to Valley of Grace’s Healing Our Brokenness Podcast!  Today we are on episode 18, entitled, Hearing God’s Voice in the Midst of Chaos.  When we think about hearing God, we often associate it with the Ten Commandments movie where God spoke to Moses on the mountain.  Sometimes God is just that powerful.  However, often hearing God can come in the small, subtle, or least grand ways than we expect. 

So, the question that you all are probably asking is, “Well, if it is small, how will I know?”

We do three things: 

  • We slow down enough to hear him.  If we aren’t slowed down enough, we won’t hear God, or gain clarity on anything else that is going on. 
  • We pray and ask God to help us to become discerning in regard to noticing his voice.
  • WE look for God to speak to us in themes or patterns.  This can be via sermons at church, small groups and bible studies, therapy, or via inner circle advice.

Part #2 Hearing God’s Voice

I have realized for myself that God speaks to me through my work.  Since I read and listen to a lot of blogs, articles, podcasts, and sermons, God will have them to center around a certain theme for me to understand that it is something that I need to work on. 

Sometimes he speaks to me in dreams to prepare me.  I have heard others say that God doesn’t speak to other people in dreams as in biblical times.  I beg to differ.  God knows each and everyone of us by name, the number of the strands of hair that is on our heads, and the names of all the stars.  I believe that God will use whatever means necessary for us to know that it is him. 

A few years ago, after going through a horrific divorce, I longed to see my dad who I hadn’t been in contact with for a while.  I searched for him, and unfortunately, came to a dead end.  About two weeks later, I had a dream that I was with him on the bus in Chicago, and he was wearing the leather jacket that he often wore when I was a kid.  I looked down at his shoes and pants, and I realized that he had the appearance of not keeping himself up.  So, in the dream, I pondered over asking him if he was homeless, but I was afraid to ask.  I woke up, wondering what this all meant.  Less than a week later, my dad got on the bus that a family friend was driving, and he was able to connect with my aunt who brought him to my house. 

The sight of him nearly made me fall to the ground.  He had indeed hit hard times and was homeless for a period of nine months.  God has given me a lot of situations like this to speak to me.

In several other instances, I thought that it was me being strong-willed/lazy in regard to something that someone else wanted me to do with them.  I am not a strong-willed person.  However, I am human, and a sinner.  And like all of us broken individuals, there are things that we know that we should do, but don’t feel like doing, and we fuss and go on and do it.  I thought this was the case in about three situations, then I realized my whole will had changed because God was trying to tell me that it is something that I shouldn’t be doing. 

It took a while to see the pattern.  They weren’t bad things.  They were things that I had already dealt with in my healing.  There was literally a pulling in my chest, and a feeling in my spirit that said, “No!  This is not for you.”  I was surprised because one time I had planned to write a certain devotion, and I felt God’s Spirit telling me, “No!”.  I decided to write on a different topic that night: Handpicked by God.  As I was riding in the car the following morning, I received confirmation that I made the right choice by getting a 3-minute clip on a Bible Teacher’s message.  It coincided with the new devotion.  The words that came out of her mouth were almost verbatim to what I had said in my devotion.  I choked up with tears.  What I thought was simplicity was God exemplifying that he is a God of order.

God can also have us to sense things in our spirit that something is wrong when we talk to people.  Their emotions and psychological dysfunctions can enter our emotional, psychological, and spiritual space.  Sometimes it takes a while to figure this out.  We are usually able to detect this in patterns after a while. 

A few months ago, I had the feeling that my confidence had been stripped away.  This was due to the trauma and the cycle of shame that revolved around it.  Even if there were things that I knew how to do, I would get afraid of not being able to do them.  This is indeed a problem with trauma, where you can forget how to do certain things temporarily at any point and time.  However, it isn’t often that it happens.  And I realized just recently, that Satan was using this fact to create low confidence in everything that I did.  Right around the time that revelation hit, I had three different instances of God speaking to me in regard to this confidence. 

The first one included a conversation with someone that I met who was able to discern this.  The second conversation was from someone wishing me a happy birthday, and then stating that 2019 would be the year of confidence for me.  The third time was reading a book, and having a specific chapter speak on self-confidence, the importance of it, and how to lean into God’s love to get it.  For some reason, I had never thought about praying for confidence. 

Here are some Truths that we can meditate on when it comes to Hearing from God in the Midst of Chaos

  • Being too busy will miss out on hearing God’s voice.
  • If we are limited to our way, we will miss out on hearing God’s voice.
  • The failure to act in obedience in the small window of time that God gives us in emergency situations may hinder us from hearing God’s voice.
  • When we fail to act on God’s instructions to share what he has placed in our heart with someone else, we miss the opportunity to bless someone.
  • When we fail to act on God’s instructions to share what he has placed in our heart with someone else, we also miss the opportunity of bringing possible correction or rebuke to that person on an issue that God was already trying to show them.

Part #3 Hearing God’s Voice

Samuel learned to identify God’s voice.  And unfortunately, he had some sad news to give to Eli, who had neglected his duties as the person in charge of the temple in 1 Samuel 3:

And the child Samuel ministered unto the LORD before Eli. And the word of the LORD was precious in those days; there was no open vision.

And it came to pass at that time, when Eli was laid down in his place, and his eyes began to wax dim, that he could not see;

And ere the lamp of God went out in the temple of the LORD, where the ark of God was, and Samuel was laid down to sleep;

That the LORD called Samuel: and he answered, Here am I.

And he ran unto Eli, and said, Here am I; for thou calledst me. And he said, I called not; lie down again. And he went and lay down.

And the LORD called yet again, Samuel. And Samuel arose and went to Eli, and said, Here am I; for thou didst call me. And he answered, I called not, my son; lie down again.

Now Samuel did not yet know the LORD, neither was the word of the LORD yet revealed unto him.

And the LORD called Samuel again the third time. And he arose and went to Eli, and said, Here am I; for thou didst call me. And Eli perceived that the LORD had called the child.

Therefore Eli said unto Samuel, Go, lie down: and it shall be, if he call thee, that thou shalt say, Speak, LORD; for thy servant heareth. So Samuel went and lay down in his place.

And the LORD came, and stood, and called as at other times, Samuel, Samuel. Then Samuel answered, Speak; for thy servant heareth.

And the LORD said to Samuel, Behold, I will do a thing in Israel, at which both the ears of every one that heareth it shall tingle.

In that day I will perform against Eli all things which I have spoken concerning his house: when I begin, I will also make an end.

For I have told him that I will judge his house for ever for the iniquity which he knoweth; because his sons made themselves vile, and he restrained them not.

And therefore I have sworn unto the house of Eli, that the iniquity of Eli’s house shall not be purged with sacrifice nor offering for ever.

And Samuel lay until the morning, and opened the doors of the house of the LORD. And Samuel feared to shew Eli the vision.

Then Eli called Samuel, and said, Samuel, my son. And he answered, Here am I.

And he said, What is the thing that the LORD hath said unto thee? I pray thee hide it not from me: God do so to thee, and more also, if thou hide any thing from me of all the things that he said unto thee.

And Samuel told him every whit, and hid nothing from him. And he said, It is the LORD: let him do what seemeth him good.

And Samuel grew, and the LORD was with him, and did let none of his words fall to the ground.

And all Israel from Dan even to Beersheba knew that Samuel was established to be a prophet of the LORD.

I have had situations where I felt God speaking to me about sharing with someone in regard to my own person struggles.  However, I allowed my own shame, and the worry about other peoples’ perception of me get in the way of obedience.  There have been other times that I was more afraid of ugly face crying and losing control in the process of vulnerability rather than the obedience itself.  I had to speak truth to myself about this.  It is sin.  I am calling it what it is.  When we know to do good, and we don’t do it, it is flat out sin.  I hope that you have enjoyed our episode of Hearing from God in the midst of Chaos.  God bless, and until next time.

Related Post:

Hearing God

Trust

It’s hard to trust. It doesn’t matter whether it is in marriages, friendships, or in our relationship with God. The difference is that with God is that he will never let us down. Either our answer will be something that is or isn’t in his will. He is our constant!

katina horton, poet, author, podcaster, valley of grace, simple functional grace-filled living, grace, trust, emotional health, mental health, spiritual health
Photo by rawpixel.com on Pexels.com

Trust

Trust

In Him.

Not On

A Whim.

His Promises

Are Real.

Not Just

What

You Feel.

Proverbs 3:5-6 New International Version (NIV)

Trust in the Lord with all your heart
    and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways submit to him,
    and he will make your paths straight.

Related Poetry

I’m in Control: The Struggle Between Two Wills

Trials