Episode 112: Blocked by Homelessness

The Valley of Grace Podcast
The Valley of Grace Podcast
Episode 112: Blocked by Homelessness
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Blockage can be caused by a lot of things: injustice, homelessness, oppression, your move on a board game, something bad that you ate. The list could literally go on and on. But the question is… What if God is doing the blocking, and his way of blocking you is homelessness? This is no laughing matter.

When our fight or flight response kicks in, the natural thing to do is to fight when someone or something blocks us. But what if fighting being blocked does more harm than good when God is doing the blocking. What if what appears to be mean, unfair, and unjust is just what we need? What if God’s blockage is God’s protection.

Take a listen to this week’s episode to find out what happened when I was blocked by homelessness.

Be blessed.

Until next time,

Katina

Episode 111: What Will Satisfy My Cravings?

The Valley of Grace Podcast
The Valley of Grace Podcast
Episode 111: What Will Satisfy My Cravings?
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There’s nothing worse than being out all day, and being hungry. What’s even worse is when you are craving your favorite food that is waiting for you in the refrigerator when you get home, but when you get home, someone in the house has eaten it. You literally feel like crying.

Now what?

What is going to satisfy the craving that you had for that fried chicken, steak sandwich, quinoa salad, Chinese food, or garbage pizza? The craving is so bad that it leaves you devastated.

Switch scenes.

You just got out of a toxic relationship. Your soul is craving that person because of the soul-tie that was created. What are you going to do?

You have three options: lean into God, go back to the cycle of unhealthy relationship patterns, or go into another toxic relationship instead of giving yourself time to heal.

Which one will you choose?

Listen in to today’s episode to find out what will satisfy our cravings.

Until next time,

Katina

I Blocked You!

Driving Down the Street

There is nothing worse than driving down a street, only to get a fourth of the way down, and realize that you can’t go any further because the street has been blocked. What do you do? You have to figure out a new route to get to your destination. What if it takes you over an hour to get there? You are for sure piping mad, and you have a right to be.

Playing a game of Checkers

Next scene, you are playing checkers, and you have been doing great so far. But then, all of a sudden, your opponent blocks any possible move that you can make. You are hemmed in, frustrated, and guess what? There isn’t a thing that you can do about it. It just doesn’t seem fair.

Movie Director 2.0

Now, let’s switch scenes again. Remember the movie that you created for an assignment in Cut? Well, the teacher just notified the class that a film director from Hollywood will be lining up students to take advantage of having their movie as one in a lineup of movies that will be played at a local film festival in Hollywood. The only requirement is to make a sequel of that movie with the main character living their Empowered New Chapter of Life.

You figure you got this. It is a piece of cake. You reenlist all of your friends and family, asking your parents to donate the food and drinks again, and you create your storyline with the same framework as your other classmates.

It is getting closer to the deadline, and after going through all of the footage, editing and re-editing, you are done. Your friends are getting spots in the film festival, but every single time you submit your sequel, you keep getting rejected. It is not just from one producer, but ten! What do you do? You ask your classmates for help.

Come to Jesus Moment

Upon asking them for help, each one tells you to setup your storyline just like they did theirs. “That is what the problem is” according to them. After ten redo’s of this movie, a frustrated worn-out crew and staff, you still haven’t been selected. You are in a state of pure exhaustion. Your mentor notices it, and walks up to you, saying the words that will forever change your life: “Be who God created you to be. Be your new story in the way that only you know how.”

You feel something shift inside, giving it everything you’ve got, you redo your whole entire sequel one last time. And guess what? You are chosen for the film festival. And not only that, you are selected as the feature film in the festival.

Moral

There will be times that God will block things from happening in your life. You won’t understand it because you thought that once you decided to live an empowered new chapter of life, the rest was history. God might be okay with opening doors for 200 people to move forward in the same way. However, for you, he may want something different. And he can and may block you because of it.

The more we fight it, the harder it becomes. The more we surrender and embrace God’s will for our lives, being who he created us to be, the more we will be in tuned to the Holy Spirit. That will help us when God decides for whatever reason, to say, “I blocked you!”

This is where the resilience and perspective that we have obtained from healing comes in.

“Be who God created you to be. Be your new story in the way that only you know how.”

She Wasn’t Ready!

When my kids were living with me, they would hang out together, laughing and joking about some teenage drama that had taken place. Whenever something happened that took one of their teenage friends by surprise, they would holler out, “S(he) wasn’t ready!” I couldn’t imitate it if I wanted to. However, it was hilarious.

Now, let’s switch over to watching a movie with a friend. You have been watching a good movie with a girlfriend. You both have pretty much figured out the ending based on all the drama that has gone on throughout the entire movie. This movie is pretty much like real life. After hanging out with people for a while, we become aware of their unhealthy patterns of behavior, and they become aware of ours. You get to the end of the movie, and both of you are completely thrown for a loop. It wasn’t supposed to end this way. In other words, “She wasn’t ready!”

Now what?

You feel cheated. Tricked. Bamboozled. Caught off guard.

Now you have to adjust your emotions, processing what you thought should have happened based upon previous patterns of behavior, but didn’t.

Now, let’s switch scenes again. Jesus died on the cross. The normal process after death is burial or cremation, and then the person’s soul either goes to heaven or hell. The body goes back to dirt eventually. Except with Jesus. His ending on earth defied all logic. And in his case, “They wasn’t ready.” I know it’s bad English, but saying weren’t doesn’t give the full effect. You get the point.

Last scene, you have been in and out of one unhealthy relationship to the next. But, you haven’t been able to decide how your story will end. Will people feel cheated because you defied the odds, and created an empowered new chapter of life, or will they say, “I knew it was going to end this way!” ?

As the director of your movie, only you can decide.

Be blessed.

Until next time,

Katina

Episode 108: A Living Room Interview with LaTrae Wilson: Creating An Empowered New Chapter of Life After Breaking Unhealthy Relationship Patterns-Part 4

The Valley of Grace Podcast
The Valley of Grace Podcast
Episode 108: A Living Room Interview with LaTrae Wilson: Creating An Empowered New Chapter of Life After Breaking Unhealthy Relationship Patterns-Part 4
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Our last podcast episode covered a lot. On today’s episode, LaTrae Wilson and I wrap up everything. As always, her no-nonsense, authentic style of communications shines through. One of the main things that we talk about is taking teeny, tiny, toe steps is progress. Creating an empowered new chapter of life requires perspective. Healing from past hurts brings resilience and perspective. Even when it seems small, any step is a move in the right direction when you are directing your new chapter of life. Be blessed and listen in for LaTrae’s final words of inspiration and encouragement.

A Living Room Interview with LaTrae Wilson: Creating An Empowered New Chapter of Life After Breaking Unhealthy Relationship Patterns-How to Reach LaTrae Wilson

Latrae Wilson’s Website

Her Book

A Living Room Interview with LaTrae Wilson: Creating An Empowered New Chapter of Life After Breaking Unhealthy Relationship Patterns-Part 4 Topics

  • Tiny Toe Steps
  • When Enough is Enough
  • Love Yourself
  • Spiritual Counseling
  • Favorite Books
  • Playlist

Until next time,

Katina

Episode 107: A Living Room Interview with LaTrae Wilson: Creating An Empowered New Chapter of Life After Breaking Unhealthy Relationship Patterns-Part 3

The Valley of Grace Podcast
The Valley of Grace Podcast
Episode 107: A Living Room Interview with LaTrae Wilson: Creating An Empowered New Chapter of Life After Breaking Unhealthy Relationship Patterns-Part 3
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Yesterday’s podcast episode left off with LaTrae Wilson contemplating leaving the faith. Today, we find out what happened. When it comes to creating an empowered new chapter of life, we often see the promise that Jesus made to us about abundant living, but we think of it as him doing everything, and us sitting back and relaxing, with our feet propped up on the coffee table, as we say, “Ok Jesus, whenever, you are ready to heal me.” Then, Jesus is looking back at us, and going, “Ok, whenever you are ready, we can do this thing together.”

Creating an empowered new chapter of life requires perspective. Healing from past hurts brings resilience and perspective.

We want to be the director of our new chapters without the participation part. However, that’s not how healing works. And in today’s podcast episode, LaTrae helps us to see just that: healing is a choice. Most women in difficult relationships struggle to make empowered choices. And part of that choice is whether we will be an active participant in our new chapter, or if we will continue to sit on the mat, and come up with excuses. One of my favorite quotes that LaTrae mentioned in this segment has to do with CHOICE: “Choosing God over foolishness. Choosing God over Failed Relationships.”

Be blessed as you listen in.

A Living Room Interview with LaTrae Wilson: Creating An Empowered New Chapter of Life After Breaking Unhealthy Relationship Patterns-Part 3

  • the power of choice
  • therapy
  • first steps in starting a new chapter
  • being uncomfortable
  • comfortable and growing
  • being stuck later in life
  • releasing toxic people

Latrae Wilson’s Website

Her Book

Until Next time,

Katina

Episode 106: A Living Room Interview with LaTrae Wilson: Creating An Empowered New Chapter of Life After Breaking Unhealthy Relationship Patterns-Part 2

The Valley of Grace Podcast
The Valley of Grace Podcast
Episode 106: A Living Room Interview with LaTrae Wilson: Creating An Empowered New Chapter of Life After Breaking Unhealthy Relationship Patterns-Part 2
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In the last podcast episode, LaTrae Wilson and I talked about generation cycles, hiding sin, keeping family secrets, low self-esteem, low self-worth, the pain of healing, and the unspoken reasons why women go back to toxic relationships. This time, we go even deeper. Our topics are processing trauma, accountability, aggression, fear of speaking up, I’m not okay, Pressure to leave the faith, and so much more! Women, you don’t want to miss this! Be blessed.

A Living Room Interview with LaTrae Wilson: Creating An Empowered New Chapter of Life After Breaking Unhealthy Relationship Patterns-Part 2 Topics

  • I’m Not Okay
  • Accountability
  • Processing Trauma
  • When Trauma Causes You to Shut Down
  • Fear of Speaking Up
  • Thoughts of Leaving the Faith
  • Kickboxing for Therapy
  • The Therapist Gave Me My Power

Latrae Wilson’s Website

Instagram: destinedtwobeblessed

Facebook: Destined To Be Blessed @Mylast20BCEB

Book

My Last 20 Breaking the Curse to Embrace the Blessing you can find them on Amazon,Google Book, Barnes and Noble or Lulu.com 

Purchase Her New Book: My Last 20

Episode 104: An Interview with Chris Archuleta: Creating An Empowered New Chapter of Life After Burnout

The Valley of Grace Podcast
The Valley of Grace Podcast
Episode 104: An Interview with Chris Archuleta: Creating An Empowered New Chapter of Life After Burnout
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Burnout is becoming more and more common in our everyday life. Hearing the word itself makes you think that perhaps it’s just an overused, over-personified thing. But it isn’t. People suffer from burnout, with its effects lasting for years. The sooner that we put boundaries into place to avoid it, the more that our minds, bodies, and souls will thank us.

In my conversation with Chris, he expressed the fact that people resist change after burnout, or any other type of brokenness because they get comfortable in what they are in, feeling that it is easier to stay the same, than to do the work.

But, we all know that healing from past hurts brings resilience and perspective. Perspective is what is needed in order to embrace the act of creating an empowered new chapter of life. I pray that this episode will empower you in creating your new chapter. Click here to check out Chris Archuleta’s site and podcast. Be blessed.

Until next time,

Katina

Podcast Topics

  • Burnout
  • Flourishing
  • Relationships
  • Resilience
  • Mindset
  • Our Will vs. God’s Will
  • The Definition of Success

Alternative Endings

You as the film producer and director of your movie, My Life Story have a job on your hands. You have finally finished filming the entire movie. The problem is, during film production, you couldn’t decide which of the five possible moving endings you wanted to use.

What are your options?

1: The wife could break through her struggles, find new love again, get engaged, kiss, and it could be a standard industry wrap-up all within the last fifteen minutes of the movie.

2: The wife could break through her struggles, and open the book store of her dreams in Pleasantville, Virginia.

3: The wife could decide to go back to school, meeting a handsome new guy on campus the first day that she goes to enroll.

4: The wife could continue struggling even till the end, but the struggle is a good struggle, a gold-refining struggle that the scripture talks about. You know, the one that produces character.

OR

5: The wife craves relationship, then enters a new relationship, has her broken areas exploited, goes downhill into a state of languishing, and the new guy walks out on her. (Pretty dramatic, but real life.)

You decide to pick Option 2: where the wife opens the bookstore of her dreams. You are satisfied with your choice. However, you have work on your hands when it comes to video editing. You will also create DVDs of the movie, creating a section called Alternative Endings, where the viewers can watch all the alternative endings for fun. Your assignment has been a success.

We are the same way.

When it comes to the last scene in your movie, you get to decide your ending. You are the one directing the last scene entitled New Chapter of Life. Will it be similar to one of the first four, or will it be Option 5? Only you can decide.

Healing from past hurts brings resilience and perspective. Creating an empowered new chapter of life requires perspective.

Be blessed.

Until next time,

Katina

Cut

Think about this…you are filming a movie for your Film Production class. The name of the movie is entitled: My Life Story. You have enlisted about 20 different friends and family members to help make this movie a success. Your parents are helping you out by purchasing food, water, and other drinks for all the volunteers. Now that everything is set, the only thing left to do is to begin filming the movie.

Everything is going fine until you get to the eighth scene of the movie. It is only ten minutes long. But, for some reason, the actors are not putting enough emphasis on the part of the scene where the wife and her husband have a huge fight, leaving her emotionally wounded, although he was the one who hurt her with his actions, turning her quest for accountability into feeling guilty that she brought up his betrayal in the first place.

All of a sudden, you yell out, “Cut!” Everybody takes a fifteen minute break. Before starting up again, you let the actors know that you have decided that instead of going through the script verbatim, leaving the wife wounded, the wife will stand up for herself, putting the husband out, and begin to pick up the broken pieces of her life. The rest of the movie will focus on her struggles, resilience, and trials as she lives life as a divorced woman.

Everyone loves this new scene. But they also realize there are several more scenes to go before the movie is done. So, they can’t take a break just yet.

As we sit and think about our own lives, we wish we could cut out a few scenes that don’t add up to the empowered new chapter part of us. We want the whole story to look good. But guess what? Unlike the actors in a film production scene, we cannot cut out the bad parts, slice the edges of the clips with razors in Adobe Premier Pro.

Both the good and the not so good parts of our story all work out in the end. The bad parts of our stories are the parts that help us build up endurance, resilience, and flourish in our new relationships. When we cut out the bad, messy, parts, we cut out the joyful, exhilarating parts as well. Healing requires wholeheartedness, for us to bring our whole selves to the table.

Healing from past hurts brings resilience, and resilience brings perspective. Creating an empowered new chapter of life requires perspective.

Be blessed.

Until next time,

Katina